Make your resolutions in style at these New Year’s Eve parties – and if I didn’t list a party you think is worthy, then leave a comment below with its details:

Victoria Room
Inspired by 1950s and ‘60s glamour girls of the silver screen such as Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s and Marilyn Monroe in Some Like it Hot, the Victoria Room will have a 1950s-themed New Year’s Eve party.

There’ll be a martini trolley and guests will be offered a Manhattan before sitting down to a three-course dinner. There’ll also be a live jazz ensemble so you can boogie to Rat Pack classics.

Tickets cost $135 per person and include canapés on arrival and a three-course dinner. To book a table call 02 9357 4488 or email info@thevictoriaroom.com.
The Victoria Room, level one, 235 Victoria Street, Darlinghurst.

The Loft
Those who want to go further back in time can try the 1920s themed party at The Loft. They claim it’ll be an “anything goes” jazz-age party, with cocktails on arrival, unlimited bar service until midnight (including free Moet champagne) plus oysters, chocolate-dipped strawberries and canapés. Entertainment includes burlesque performer Rachel St James, soul act Grover plus DJs Pete Dolso and Kirsty Lee. $234 (including booking fee), go to the Moshtix site to purchase.
From 6pm to 3am, 3 Lime Street, King Street Wharf, see The Loft website

Shangri-La
Another 1920s-themed party (I suspect Underbelly has a lot to answer for) is at the Shangri-La Hotel’s Altitude Restaurant and Blu Bar, which is 36 levels up and with a view that directly faces the harbour (the photo above actually shows the Shangri-La’s view). For $840 per person you get a seven-course degustation meal with matching wines, champagne and arguably the best view in Sydney. Call 9250 6247 or email dine.slsn@shangri-la.com to book.
Shangri-La Hotel, 176 Cumberland Street, The Rocks, Sydney.

Bel Mondo
A more affordable alternative is at Bel Mondo, which isn’t as high up but still has good views of the Harbour Bridge and Opera House. For $330 per person you get a degustation menu that includes pan-fried scallops with confit pork belly, as well as grain-fed beef tenderloin with goats cheese ravioli, plus there’ll be a live band (The Capitals). Go to Bel Mondo’s website or phone 9241 3700 to book.
Bel Mondo, Gloucester Walk, The Rocks.

Eau-de-Vie
If you value cocktails over views then the Eau-de-Vie party might be for you. Tickets are $100 per person including canapés, champagne at midnight and four cocktails. Contact info@eaudevie.com.au or phone 0422 263 226.
From 7pm-2am, Eau de Vie, 229 Darlinghurst Road, Darlinghurst

Zeta
Get funky at Zeta, which has themed its party after The Jacksons. The band Brown Sugar will be performing hits from Michael Jackson, Janet and the Jackson 5, as well as a host of other R&B hits. Tickets are $85.90 (including booking fee) – book at Moshtix or contact Deni Di Filippo on 0417 558 894.
Zeta Bar, Level 4, Hilton Sydney, 488 George Street, Sydney CBD.

Ivy
Be quick if you want to go to the NYE dance party at Ivy, with first release tickets already sold out (the others start from $106.55 including the booking fee). The party takes in all of Ivy’s venues including the general admission Ivy bar and The Lawn, plus there’ll be VIP ticketed areas in The Den and Ivy Lounge as well as Pool Club and Changeroom. Pool Club VIP tickets (for $311.20 including booking fee) offer exclusive access to Pool Club and Changeroom where there’ll be private sets from DJs Erick Morillo and Dimitri From Paris. Book at Moshtix
Ivy, 330 George Street, Sydney. Phone 9240 3000 or see the Ivy website.

Wildfire
It’s hard to get closer to the fireworks than at Wildfire, where for $350 per person you’ll get hot and cold canapés, drinks and live entertainment that includes Gelato (featuring Natalie Conway), The Audio Thieves and Members of Femme Fatales.
Wildfire, 8pm-2am, Overseas Passenger Terminal. See the Wildfire website for details.

Related posts:

1. New Year’s Eve parties in Sydney – 2010
2. Sydney New Year’s Eve party guide – 2009

A book with pop-out laminated beer coasters is so odd I just had to write about it. (It reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where Kramer comes up with the idea of a coffee table book that also functions as a coffee table itself).

Called Grab a Coldie!, this is a book about 80s Aussie beers – which ones were popular and which ones bit the dust thanks to the heady business mergers and takeovers that saw the beer business change dramatically in that decade.

The information provided on each beer and brewer isn’t exactly encyclopedic – there are just a few paragraphs on each one – but I love the laminated replicas of original 80s beer coasters. Furthermore, when you pop them out you’ll find beer trivia underneath. The photos of 80s advertisements also brings back a few memories.

The book’s written by Michael Bannenberg, who spent over 30 years working in beer advertising. It’s published by The Five Mile Press and is priced at $24.95.

PS Since many of the beers mentioned in the book are no longer with us, I asked Bannenberg which one he misses the most.

“Abbots Lager would be the beer I miss the most,” he said. “It was like Melbourne Bitter – a great beer but under the radar.”

If there are any fallen Aussie beers you miss, then let us know in the comments section.

PS 2 I know it’s lame to take a shot of the book with my cat, but he honestly just wandered into the shot. I promise I’m not one of those pathetic cat owners.

PS 3 Ok, I lied. I’m one of those pathetic cat owners.

Related posts:

1. Alcoholic book clubs, an ex-stripclub turned bar and other news
2. Exclusive clubs in Sydney (and a mini review of Beach Haus)

What I love about writing top 10 features is they piss people off so much. A few days back I had a feature in the SMH on Sydney’s top 10 pubs and, naturally, it caused a little friction. Actually, it caused a LOT of friction.

Some complained the feature was subjective. Well … yes. Yes it was. It’s a list of 10 pubs I like to go to. Furthermore, I was limited to only 10, when there are SO MANY pubs in Sydney just as good. In Balmain and Rozelle alone, I could say that The Welcome Hotel and the Riverview are easily as good as The Three Weeds, which I listed. And then I also love The London’s dog friendly balcony. But then, I was not only limited to 10 pubs, but also writing for a specific audience – namely the people who read Metro, which is the youth-orientated entertainment SMH section that commissioned the feature.

(My favourite complaint was from several people who suggested I need to drink in more pubs since they disagreed with my list. I’d laugh at that, but my liver hurts too much.)

But enough of my bitching. In all fairness to the detractors, there ARE plenty of great pubs in Sydney that I should have listed but didn’t. In fact, I still wake up screaming at 3am every night because I didn’t include The Local Taphouse or The Carrington. And since I realise that you, my sweet and gentle Bar Zine reader, are far more knowledgeable about Sydney’s alcoholic venues than the average SMH reader, I want to know your views. Which pubs would you have put on a top 10 list? For those wanting a recap, here is the list I created for Metro below, along with links to the relevant Bar Zine reviews when available:

1. Hero of Waterloo
2. Carlisle Castle
3. Kinselas
4. The Norfolk
5. Darlo Bar (to be honest, I’ve been planning on reviewing this pub for Bar Zine for years but, even though I’ve drunk countless times there, I just never got around to it).
6. Lord Nelson
7. Flinders
8. Bavarian Bier Café on O’Connell Street (chosen for its art deco interior, which I love, rather than it’s a Bavarian Bier Cafe although I do like their beers.)
9. Excelsior
10. The Three Weeds

(PS the photo shown above is of the old Caledonian Hotel, King Street, Darling Harbour [courtesy of State Records NSW]. No date was recorded for it. It really has no connection to this story, but I like photos of Sydney’s old and forgotten pubs.)

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I know I don’t write enough about bar food. It’s partly because I’m too cheap to spend money on anything other than hard liquor and partly because … actually, it’s mainly because I’m cheap. However, I do often go back to the bars to update the reviews and sooner or later I sometimes even give in to hunger and eat something. As such, here are my favourite alcoholic dining options:

The Dip soul-food diner at Goodgod
I’ve got to be honest – I’ve done a complete 360 on this club. When I first saw Goodgod I was apprehensive to say the least (the strings of coloured lights and white grottos are an acquired taste). Now I love it – and the American-style food that they make in the diner down the back (which they call The Dip) is one of the reasons.

To start with, they make the best hotdog I’ve ever had. Ever. Better than the dog I had at Pink’s in LA. Better than the dogs I devoured at Gray’s Papaya in NYC. Better than … ok, I’ve done enough shameless sausage-related travel-name dropping, but you get the gist. The Dip’s Lev’s Dawg is smoky, kosher (although I’m not sure why that’s a good thing), served with chipotle mayo, tomato salsa and grilled yellow peppers and comes in a steamed bun that’s so fluffy and spongy that it would be disgusting if it didn’t work so beautifully (you can see a photo of it below). Their pulled pork nachos are also awesome for those who want something to share.

Goodgod bar / The Dip, Basement, 53-55 Liverpool Street, Chinatown, Sydney. Open Wednesday until 1am, Thursday until 2am, Friday until 5am, Saturday until 5am. See the Goodgod website

Grasshopper
I suspect a lot of people don’t realise just how good the food at Grasshopper is. We all think of it as a bar (and it’s a great bar at that) but I had the best steak of my life in its upstairs French-style restaurant. At the risk of pissing off vegetarians everywhere, this was a piece of meat that made me realise there is a point to life. And it is to eat more steak.

Grasshopper, Temperance Lane (between 389 and 391 George Street), Sydney CBD. Open Monday to Friday. See the Grasshoppper website or phone 9947 9025 for more details

The Duke
I didn’t even think there was a point in eating fried chicken wings until I ate them in this bar/bistro above The Flinders. I now know better.

Duke Bistro, 65 Flinders Street, Darlinghurst. See the Duke Bistro website. Open Tuesday to Saturday.

Norfolk and The Excelsior
I’m mentioning both these bars in the same paragraph because I like them for the same reason – their tacos. They’re cheap ($5 at the Excelsior, $5.50 at Norfolk), they’re a world away from the crap that so many Mexican restaurants serve, and they soak up alcohol beautifully. Having said that, I am also partial to the Mexican at Café Pacifico.

The Norfolk Hotel, 305 Cleveland Street, Surry Hills (corner of Walker Street). See the Norfolk Hotel website

The Excelsior / El Loco Cantina. 64 Foveaux Street, Surry Hills. Open Monday-Saturday until late, and Sunday until 10pm. See the El Loco website here.

Rockpool Bar and Grill
If you’re suited up and in need of a burger in between mergers then the CBD’s Rockpool Bar and Grill is the place to go. The $24 burger is made with wagyu beef and comes with bacon, gruyere cheese and zuni pickle. It’s possibly the best burger in Sydney.

Rockpool Bar & Grill, 66 Hunter Street, Sydney. See the Rockpool bar website. Open Monday to Saturday.

Porteno
The only thing as good as the Banana Old Fashioned cocktail in the upstairs bar (called Gardel’s) is the aroma of suckling pork and lamb that wafts from the open roasting pit in this Argentinean restaurant. Aside from the wood-fired pork and lamb, the grilled tuna with asparagus and charred jalapeño and garlic dressing is amazing.

Porteno / Gardel’s Bar, 358 Cleveland Street, Surry Hills. Phone 02 8399 1440 or see the Porteno website

Have I missed out on anything?
I’d love to know what you think – so if you reckon I left any bars out, then leave a comment below nominating your favourite bar to eat in:

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I was asked to write a feature for The Sydney Morning Herald on great bars to go to after a seeing a performance and choosing the bars was tough (PS the SMH’s standfirst – which for non-editors is the blurb above the first paragraph) should really state: “We review some cool bar options” rather than “small bar options” since not all the bars are small).

To start with, I just didn’t have enough room to list all the bars I wanted (it was primarily for the printed Metro section, where real estate is at a premium) so I had to make some tough calls based on proximity to the venues and what I thought Metro’s readers would prefer. For example, when it came to listing bars near the State Theatre I focused on Grandma’s and Grasshopper rather than Zeta Bar because I thought they were more suited to Metro.

The hardest choice I had to make was choosing LL Wine and Dine over Bootleg Bar for my Kings Cross venue. I actually like Bootleg a lot and it would have been suited for the feature – but I only had room to list one bar for that area.

There were other omissions (and possible contradictions) – for example, I didn’t list the Norfolk even though I listed Porteno’s Gardel’s Bar (they’re both near 505 and the Belvoir Street Theatre) due yet again to a lack of space, even though I can imagine many people arguing that maybe the Norfolk would have been better suited for the feature. However, as much as I like the Norfolk’s tacos and casual atmosphere, I just love Porteno’s rockabilly vibe and their cocktails.

Of course, you might disagree with me on some of my calls or know of other bars you’d have liked to have seen mentioned. If so, feel free to leave a comment below:

Related posts:

1. What are your top 10 Sydney pubs?
2. The best dive bars in Sydney
3. Best Auckland bars

When it comes to NZ bars most people think of Wellington but Auckland has some great drinking holes. Thanks to some alcoholic friends of mine in NZ who were willing to share their knowledge and punish their livers with me, I spent a happy couple of weeks crawling the city’s bars and then wrote a feature about it for the SMH’s Travel section – and I thought I might as well point to it here as well.

Out of all the bars I listed in it, my favourite is Mo’s. It has a great retro vibe and a friendly bartender who made me a good cognac-based sazerac even though it wasn’t on the menu (and even though most NZ bars don’t stock decent absinthe – most of the sazeracs I had there were made with Pernod).

Even though it’s more of a French restaurant than a bar, I did like Pastis for three reasons: 1) I fell in love with the French accordionist who plays there; 2) I love brass counter tops and 3) it was the first time I ever drank a Mauresque, which is a pastis that has orgeat syrup added to it (although I think, from memory, that Pastis used hazelnut syrup instead). Either way, I loved it.

Another favourite is the Wine Cellar on K Road. It has a casual underground feel and hosts some interesting indie live music – I ended up going several times and wish Sydney had a bar like it. I also wish one of the bands I saw perform there – Heart Attack Alley (a punk/blues three-piece) – will come to Sydney sometime.

The last bar I’ll mention here is Rakinos, which looks like an old office that’s been converted into a bar. If you’re in the CBD and want a casual bar with good DJs, a balcony and cheap but tasty bistro food then this is worth a look.

Of course, if there are any Auckland bars you think I missed in my feature then feel free to leave a comment here:

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I fell in love with Wellington and its bars two years back – so much so I wrote a feature about it for The Sydney Morning Herald. Now, after going back to the windy, small but charmingly sophisticated city, I thought an update might be worthwhile.

Most of the bars I wrote about then are still there, with the exception of Sandwiches in Courtenay Place. A few new bars have opened up near the waterfront but, at the end of the day, my two favourites still remain the Hawthorn Lounge and Matterhorn.

Although Matterhorn was recently voted the 16th-best bar in the world in the Drinks International poll, it’s the Hawthorn Lounge that impresses me most. It’s small, cosy, has a retro English vibe and, most importantly, on my last visit they made a great Sazerac and delivered impeccable service. For me it felt like the Wellington version of Eau De Vie.

Matterhorn, located in a converted 50s coffee house, is a much grander affair and with a larger cocktail menu. On the upside, I was impressed with the effort they put into making my Fig and Cigar Sazerac (Martell VS cognac, cigar liqueur, absinthe, Peychaud’s bitters, Fee Brothers Whiskey Barrel bitters, figs) – it’s always nice to see a bartender take out a mortar and set alight to fruit within it – but a smile wouldn’t have gone astray. Hell, half the reason I go to NZ is just to see people smile. However, the restaurant service there was faultless and the meals worth trying.

Two wine bars/restaurants I hadn’t mentioned in my SMH feature are Pravda and Arbitrageur. Pravda, as its name suggests, has an European feel – it’s like an elegant French bistro with a great wine selection and the best mushroom risotto I’ve ever had in my life. Arbitrageur has even more of an upmarket feel and prides itself on its wine and food matching – or, if you want, you can just perch at the bar and sample from one of Wellington’s best wine cellars.

I still love Motel, a cocktail bar hidden in a dark dingy alley (Forresters Lane – look for a tiny sign in the wall) and which has my favourite bar counter in Wellington to sit at – it really does have a 50s Rat Pack vibe to it. And, if you just want to listen to great music in a non-pretentious, fun and yet somewhat arty place, then you can’t beat Mighty Mighty.

Lastly, I can’t not mention Logan Brown. Even though it’s a restaurant and not a bar, I did have one of the best dining experiences of my life there and I like how its small bar area, primarily meant for customers waiting for a table, manages to have an aquarium-topped bar counter without looking tacky.

Of course, if you think I missed out on a Wellington bar then feel free to add a comment below:

Related posts:

1. Melbourne bars that (almost) make us want to move down there
2. Best Auckland bars
3. Best Sydney bars to go to after a gig

UPDATE: the 2011 New Year’s Eve Guide is now up. Click here to read it.

For some inexplicable reason I usually find myself on New Year’s Eve in some squalid dive bar downing shots with failed novelists and cat owners (it might be time to reassess my lifestyle) but I realise Bar Zine’s discerning readers might expect more from life.

As such, here’s a few parties that caught my eye. Unlike last year, I’m not even pretending this is the definitive list to NYE parties – but the ones I have listed sound good to me:

*Eau-de-Vie is having a Mad Men-style New Year’s Eve party. There will be prizes for the best-dressed belle and beau (or should we say Joan and Don?). Tickets are $75 per person, including canapés, champagne at midnight and two Mad Men cocktails. To book tickets, contact 0422 263 226 or email info@eaudevie.com.au

* Then again, if you want to be near Sydney Harbour and the fireworks you can spend NYE on Fort Denison – if you’re willing to spend $1200 per person, which includes water transport to the island and all NSW National Park fees. There’ll be pre-dinner cocktails and canapés, followed by a sit down four-course dinner and live entertainment. Phone TE Catering on 02 9361 5208 or email enquiries@tecatering.com.au

*Talking of fireworks, you can also see them at Opera Bar’s Disco Wonderland and Beach House NYE party. There’ll be disco on the lower floor (complete with roller skating girls and drag queen shows) whereas the upper concourse will be decked out like the beach, with day-beds and sun lounges. Disco Wonderland costs $295 per person (drinks not included) and Beach House costs $495 per person (includes drinks and canapés). Visit www.iwannaticket.com.au to buy tickets or see www.operabar.com.au

* I’m not sure how much of the fireworks you can see from Zeta’s balcony but the odds are their cocktails will be great. Zeta’s New Year’s Eve party will have RnB soul band Brown Sugar playing as well as DJ Trey and DJ Libre. Entry is $60 per person (includes a glass of Chandon) – see http://www.zetabar.com.au

* Another NYE party with a view is Luna Park’s Harbour Party. There’ll be rides and live music and DJs (artists include Sneaky Sound System and Digitalism). Tickets from $144.50 – see www.harbourparty.com

* As for the day after New Year’s Eve – the guys behind White Revolver and Cream Tangerine are having their Wrecked at Bondi Beach party at the Deck Bar of the Swiss Grand Hotel on New Year’s Day. Tickets include entry and two drink tokens (cocktails + Coronas), live music, DJs and VIP access to White Revolver. There’ll also be access to the beach. Tickets available on Moshtix or email Emily@relove.com.au

Oh yes: if you think I missed a place (and I’m sure I’ve missed many great ones) then give us your pick of where to go on NYE by leaving a comment below:

Related posts:

1. New Year’s Eve parties in Sydney – 2011
2. Sydney New Year’s Eve party guide – 2009

I was inspired to write this feature on exclusive clubs (many of which offer memberships) for The Sydney Morning Herald after reviewing White Revolver (pictured above) for Bar Zine.

Whether you love or hate White Revolver – and I’ve spoken to people who feel both ways about it – there’s no doubt there’s something appealing about a club that has a secret revolving door that, once unlocked, leads to an underground dance club.

The newest club in the feature is Beach Haus, which has opened up where the well known Barons used to be. Unlike Barons, which had a dark bohemian vibe and collected an eclectic group of denizens (and, incidentally, was one of my all time favourite bars in the world), Beach Haus has a clean, bright and highly designed atmosphere. There’s blond wood paneling embedded with strips of mirrors, lounges against the walls and a chandelier that all combine to make it feel somewhat like a hotel lobby. Talking of lobbies, members are given swipe cards to get through Beach Haus’s apartment-style street entrance.

I didn’t have room in my feature to review Beach Haus but I did actually have some cocktails there with Wing Woman. While you can go to the bar, which is manned by guys in sailor suits (my gay wingman would have loved this) there’s actually table- (or should I say lounge- ?) service where the impossibly attractive hostesses take your order.

I grab a spiced apple and lychee mojito with peppermint syrup while WingWoman has a Beach Bum (pineapple, 10 Cane rum, passionfruit and apricot brandy).

Like the décor, there’s nothing challenging about the cocktails: they’re good, strong and easy to drink, although what is novel about the cocktail list is that it also features share cocktails. These are large enough to be drunk by four to six people and cost upwards of $130. WingWoman and I see a group across from us drinking from a giant vessel but, to be honest, I don’t see the appeal. After all, if you want to catch cooties from your friends then why not at least get a range of drinks so you can all get a sip of something different? But I digress.

What I do like is the DJ, who’s playing an eclectic mix of music from Beat International’s Dub Be Good to Me (one of my favourite dance tracks) to a Crowded House remix.

Another club that has a retro feel about it is Shh!, which feels a little like a Vegas club from the 50s – think Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin sipping martinis. Unfortunately, however, I don’t fancy my chances of ever being allowed in there again – I was lucky to get in the first time, since I didn’t have the password that the owner needs to SMS you despite being given his number by an acquaintance.

The other clubs mentioned in my feature are Level 6 at Ivy, Tatlers and De Nom. If you’ve been to any of these then feel free to leave a comment below – we always want to hear about our readers’ experiences!

Related posts:

1. Underground (and not-so-underground) clubs in Sydney
2. Alcoholic book clubs, an ex-stripclub turned bar and other news
3. White Revolver – Bondi Beach

There’s no doubt Melbourne’s bars are amongst the best in the world. From hole-in-the-wall laneway bars that add an extra dimension to the CBD to cocktail lounges where the primary focus is on the drinks, Melbourne bars often have a unique feel about them that relies more on atmosphere and personality than shiny décor. As such, despite being a loyal Sydneysider who’s proud of how my city’s bars are developing, here’s my guide to the bars in Melbourne that impressed me the most on my last visit:

Melbourne CBD bars:

Murmur
If I were to move to Melbourne, this would be the reason. Located in an old storehouse in the middle of the CBD (there are still old pulleys, ropes and crankshafts in the ceiling), this not only has a great atmosphere and low-key crowd but stunningly great cocktails and a friendly bartender with an eye for details. I have a great brandy sour (which a lady next to me at the bar tells me is a real leg opener – I think I’m in love with her) but the stand out is the burnt orange bourbon sour, which is just fantastic: possibly the best sour I ever had, with an aftertaste of cinnamon, vanilla and perhaps even of apple crumble, while the aroma reminds me of popcorn. I want another.
Murmur, Level 1, 17 Warburton Lane, Melbourne – see the Murmur bar website

Section 8
Made from two shipping containers that were plunked down in an old Chinatown carpark, Section 8 is one of the rawest bars you’ll find in Australia. With graffiti-covered walls, a concrete floor, a corrugated roof that only covers a small portion of the bar (if it rains you have to either be very precise in where you sit or, better yet, bring a brolly), lanterns and, at least when we were there, funk playing on the soundsystem, this is an easy going, low-key drinking spot that’s rapidly become a Melbourne favourite (even on a Tuesday night it’s busy and they apparently now have door people on Fridays for crowd control). Cocktails are on offer but I personally prefer the beer selection (I choose to drink the Monteiths Summer Ale, which I love).
Section 8, 27-29 Tattersalls Lane, Melbourne. See the Section 8 website for more details.

1806
Named after the year in which the word cocktail first appeared, this is almost more of a cocktail museum that dispenses its exhibits than a bar, as it serves classic cocktails that you can’t even get in most places (the menu alone provides a good cocktail crash course by explaining the history behind each drink).

I order the martinez, which first appeared in 1886 and is the precursor to the martini. Made with Old Tom Gin (which is sweeter than normal gin), orange bitters and dry vermouth, this is less sharp and much smoother than a martini (and if anyone knows of a Sydney bar that serves this then please leave a comment below, since I’ve fallen in love with it). The Gay Wingman, who defected to Melbourne recently, orders the Carthusian Flip, which is made with yellow chartreuse, Bowmore Islay Malt, egg yolk and Carpano Antica. The result, as with the martinez, is well balanced and very easy to drink (and, in the word sof the GW, “fluffy”). The decor here is great, with old school chandeliers and chesterfield sofas, while the clientele is mixed: there’s a group of rockabillies at one end, some goths upstairs, and an elderly couple to our side. The service is also fantastic.
1806, 169 Exhibition Street, Melbourne. See the 1806 bar website

Gin Palace
Living up to its name, this Melbourne cocktail veteran (pictured at the top of this page) specialises in martinis and serves some of the best I’ve ever had, especially in Australia. My favourite is the 1951 martini, which won the 1951 Martini Competition in Chicago. This is a classic dry gin martini that has Cointreau splashed on the inside of the glass and is served with anchovy-stuffed olives (my only criticism is that while the olives are nice, they could have been better – but then, I am an olive snob). The décor also matches, looking like a cross between a boudoir and a grandmother’s house – think lots of little paintings, curtained off areas and settees – but then again, that could be the martinis talking.
Gin Palace, 10 Russell Place, Melbourne. Open Daily 4pm-3am. See the Gin Palace website for more details.

The Sweatshop at Seamstress
There are two separate cocktails bars in this four-level building (which used to be a clothes factory, hence the name Seamstress) but the GW and I decide to try the bottom bar that’s called The Sweatshop.

As the name suggests, this is a hot and sweaty affair (at least in summer) with crates to sit on, wire cages on the low ceiling that contain fabric rolls and an overall too-cool-for-school vibe that straddles the line between being hip enough for me to want to come back and being so consciously hip that I’m not sure I want to stay.

I do, however, with my GW ordering the Brooklyn sazerac while I get the Phwoar cocktail. Despite containing Islay single malt whisky, which I love, the Phwoar doesn’t make me go phwoar (I personally don’t think its blackberry flavour gels with whisky) but I am envious of the GW’s sazerac (although I still prefer the one I had at Rambutan). Next time I’m here, however, I’ll try the rooftop bar.
SweatShop bar at Seamstress, Basement, 113 Lonsdale Street, Melbourne. Mon-Sat 5pm-1am. See the Seamstress website for more details

The Croft Institute
I fell in love with this bar on a rainy night several years ago when I walked down a dingy alley in Chinatown, past the backs of restaurants, and even though I almost gave up when I reached the end of the alley only to find nothing, I nonetheless turned into the tiny alley perpendicular to it and sure enough, after walking a bit more, I noticed a light at the end and there was the Croft Institute: a bar made to look like an old fashioned science lab, right down to the counters with Bunsen burners, cocktails in test tubes and beakers and other lab equipment on display.

I’ve been back a few times since then and have had some great drinks, most notably an amaretto sour, and the crowd was usually of the art student variety. However, when I go back now the vibe is different: there’s a doorman out front, even though it’s a Thursday night, and the crowd inside the bar is mainly loud guys in suits. However, it might just be a bad night – and anyway, if you’re after the classic Melbourne laneway bar experience (or are a science nut) then I still think the Croft is worth going to.
The Croft Institute, 21 Croft Alley, Melbourne.

Lily Blacks
With a 1920s speakeasy vibe, Lily Blacks is retro and yet classy. There are lounges that are spread out, old-fashioned light fixtures and a great curved wooden bar you can sit at. I order the Lily Iced T, which is made from lime, mint, Montenegro amaro and Noily Prat while the GW orders the Absinthe Minded (chocolate bitters, gin, vodka, apple liqueur and of course, absinthe).

The Lily Iced T is great (I’m a big fan of amaro) but to my surprise it’s the Absinthe Minded that grabs my interest. Even though I usually believe the only cocktail that absinthe should be in is a sazerac, the Absinthe Minded might be an exception – it’s well balanced, extremely easy to drink and the chocolate bitters are a great addition.
Lily Blacks, 3/12-18 Meyers Place, Melbourne. Open Monday to Saturday until 3am. See the Lily Blacks website

Golden Monkey
This subterranean bar underneath a Chinese restaurant is styled to look like a 1920s opium den (think Indiana Jones) and I like the cigarette ad in the stairwell that has a Chinese cowboy as the Marlboro man. With lots of nooks and crannies (and, to our surprise, free finger food such as barbecue buns – although this might not be a regular thing) this is a cool spot for a beer or two.
Golden Monkey, rear 389 Lonsdale Street (enter via Hardware Lane), Melbourne – see the Golden Monkey website for more details

Fitzroy bars

Joe’s Shoe Store
There’s more to Melbourne bars than the ones in the CBD laneways and one of my favourites is in Northcote, a suburb just north of Fitzroy. Keeping the name of the previous tenant, Joe’s Shoe Store feels like the type of American saloon that Tom Waits would slouch in, thanks to the old booths, retro fittings and black and white photos of boxers. You can also order pizza from the pizza place next door (although don’t leave it too late, which is what happens when the GW and I get there). Still, even sans pizza, this is a dark and atmospheric drinking hole, right down to the old fashioned bar counter and turntables.
Joe’s Shoe Store, 233 High Street, Northcote. Phone 03 9482 7666

Little Creatures Dining Hall
What I like about Melbourne is its small, intimate drinking spaces, so I was sceptical about the Little Creatures Dining Hall. After all, as much as I love Little Creatures beer the hall is the antithesis of a small bar – in fact it’s so large it could almost be an aircraft hangar (it’s really an old warehouse). However, they did a good job in fixing it up and the GW, who lives in the area, insists it has great food – and he’s right.

We order Rogers Pale Ale as well as the calamari salad and the lamb parcels, which are gorgeous but could almost be a dessert due to their sweetness. The calamari salad is the stand out, though: grilled, tender and better than I thought it would be. The service is also exceptionally friendly.
Little Creatures Dining Hall, 222 Brunswick Street, Fitzroy. See the Little Creatures Dining Hall website for more details.

Dexter Bar and Cafe
It might have the same name as TV’s most well known serial killer but this small locals bar has a friendly, casual vibe. You can sit at the bar counter; play the provided board games or with the boules set in the courtyard or just listen to the turntable. Good for a beer or the all-day-breakfast.
Dexter Bar and Café, 123 Queens Parade, Clifton Hill.

Wesley Anne
Looking like a medieval stable with its stonewalls and high arched ceilings, this is actually a bar (mainly wines and beers) that has live music and a casual feel. Worth checking out if you’re in the area.
Wesley Anne, 250 High Street, Northcote Hill. See the Wesley Anne website for more details

St Kilda bars

Barney Allen’s
This is actually a restaurant co-owned by Iain Hewitson but it has such a large central bar that you can sit at late at night that, to me, it feels like a drinking hole that serves food. What I like about it is that it doesn’t feel pretentious – there aren’t any door nazis, for example – and yet it’s a cool and elegant place to have a drink.

It also has a friendly bartender who makes a great cocktail called the Salma. Made with Frangelico, limoncello and 1800 blanco tequila, it has the tang of a margarita and the limoncello adds a slight sweetness and citrus element while making it less sour.
Barney Allen’s, 14 Fitzroy Street, St. Kilda. See the Barney Allen’s website for more details.

Claypots Seafood Restaurant and Bar
Eating here is a Melbourne tradition for me and every time I go the place changes. The first time I went four years ago or so the place was a tiny but atmospheric hole in the wall. The second time it expanded into a much larger restaurant and now it’s spawned a small bar next door.

I get there late at night in desperate need of sustenance and drink (I had a blind date beforehand who, after two drinks, decided she couldn’t stand the sight of me) and so I front up to the tiny counter. Near the door a jazz duo plays while along the wall a number of people watch the band and drink. In short, there’s a very cool, intimate vibe that I think might provide me with some consolation.

The kitchen’s closed but the friendly bartender says I can still get the last of the Crystal Bay prawns, which I do along with a glass of white. Despite not being a fan of cold prawns I absolutely love these: they’re fresh and full of flavour. I’ll definitely come back again.
Claypots Seafood Restaurant and Bar, 213 Barkly Street, St Kilda.

Do you think we left out any Melbourne bars or have an opinion on any of the ones we mentioned? If so, feel free to leave a comment below:

This story is sponsored by Stamford Hotels, who kindly put me up in a suite for one night in Melbourne. If I hadn’t enjoyed my stay then, quite bluntly, I’d leave it at that but I have to say that it was plush and made me feel like Richard Gere’s character in Pretty Woman (sans prostitute and the Lotus, I’ll add). Compared to the room, the inflatable mattress I slept on in the GW’s study afterwards seemed like a step down – no offence to the GW, of course.

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